It’s hard to believe we are already in the second week of February, and Valentine’s Day is upon us. While most months have those special days that allow us to celebrate with loved ones, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Valentine’s Day are when we feel an innate desire to express those special bonds of love. However, it wasn’t until today that I responded to a friend’s post on a social media site that elicited a subtle clarity, reminding us that our love and compassion shouldn’t be limited to those closest to us or who only share our beliefs.
Michael Riley, or “Riley” as he is known to his friends, was a long-time liaison for the Charlotte County School system but perhaps is better known as the founder of one of southwest Florida’s most popular rock and soul bands called “The Boogiemen.” I met Riley years ago when I interviewed him for one of my monthly newsletters and found him to be as genuine as anyone I had ever known and who embraced the values we hold so dear. Riley’s love for people wasn’t limited to those closest to him; he truly wanted people in his community to be happy, respected, and cared for. Despite a long life of service to his community and others, along with the ups and downs life throws at us, he maintains a childlike innocence, hoping we can return to the values and respect for one another we had growing up, and often expresses his frustrations why we aren’t doing better.
In his social media post, he referenced a Bob Dylan song, “The Times They Are A Changing,” that Riley reflected on how his father’s generation would sit down and work through their differences. In contrast, today, we blame each other for the problems we face. He ended his post by saying, “Instead of fixing the problem, we blame each other. What a shame, we have truly become The Divided States of America.” Rarely do I comment on social media, but this time, I felt compelled to do so. I responded by saying that while much of what he wrote was true, we didn’t need to feel our best days were behind us and that my feeling was that it started with us. I then recalled a song Bryan Adams and Tina Turner sang together called “It’s Only Love.”
When I researched the inspiration behind Adam’s lyrics, I found that it was written as a reassuring song about love and the challenges that came with it. It referenced the complexities of life and how love can be complicated at times, but that unconditional love is worth fighting for. I immediately thought, “We have become a society that easily rejects those who don’t think like us.” Perhaps more sobering is we have to be reminded how off course we’ve become, which couldn’t have become more evident during this NFL (National Football League) season. Over the past few years, many players have had the words “End Racism” emblazoned on the back of their helmets. This exact quote was also prominently displayed in the end zones of many football stadiums. This year, “End Racism” was changed to “Choose Love.” For some, this was a step in the right direction. For me, it was sad that we had to be reminded to act in a way that should come naturally to us.
I learned a long time ago that friends aren’t afraid to share their feelings and beliefs with you, even if they are in direct contrast to yours. As my parents used to say, “You can always learn something from listening to others. Whether you agree or not, something will always be gained.” Riley is that friend, and while we have oftentimes had differing political opinions, we have always come away with that same close bond of mutual understanding and appreciation for each other.
Perhaps Bryan Adams should have added, “And Not For a Day!” when he wrote his song “It’s Only Love.”
-Gary Cardillo
While most people would like to talk about themselves, Gary and Gail have always put their clients first, and their diverse backgrounds have provided their clients an unparalleled level of service and knowledge throughout the past years.