Throughout the years of writing these newsletters, I’ve often shared my love for the summer months and all the activities that occurred during that time of the year. While my father loved the fall, I wasn’t nearly as enamored with it as the fall brought to a close my favorite time of year and was the precursor to the harsh winter weather yet to come. Having moved to Florida twenty-five years ago from New York, I felt God gave me a reward to enjoy the season I loved most on a year-round basis. Like many, I envisioned myself boating, golfing, and going to the beach whenever I wanted. What better way to enjoy the quality of life I always dreamed of? As for hurricanes, what hurricanes? I encountered them before; how much worse could they be in Florida if we ever did get one?
It was September 2001, and we were in our home for a year when we encountered our first storm. Not having the sophisticated meteorologist and radar we have today, I noticed it was getting breezy and had no idea what was on its way. A friend of mine said, “Are you ready for Gabrielle?” I replied, “We never met; who is she?” Sensing my ignorance, my friend replied, “Get ready; you’ll meet her in a few hours.” Little did I realize I would be trading in hors d’oeuvres for hours trying to lower the Bahama shutters we had. That was nature’s way of spoon-feeding me the storms that were yet to come.
Having lived on the water most of my life, I vividly recollect Hurricanes Agnes and Gloria years later impacting Long Island, where yachts of all sizes were strewn over the island beaches. While it was a very sobering reminder of man’s weakness in contrast to nature’s strength, those experiences paled by comparison to the destructive forces we’ve encountered since moving to Florida 25 years ago.
It seems like yesterday when Hurricane Charlie impacted our area, and we stood in disbelief, seeing many of our homes and communities lying in ruin. I initially thought this was something we were only supposed to see on TV, not experience first-hand, as camera crews, National Guard troops, Florida’s Governor Jeb Bush, and other responders descended on our area. It was also our first encounter with the Weather Channel’s Jim Cantore, who, after all these years of visits to our area, may want to consider a permanent residence! Perhaps it is like a boxer getting a punch that sends him to the canvas but has the heart and desire to pick himself back up to continue the fight, and that is what we did.
Since then, we have encountered a host of other hurricanes and tropical storms, including the recent back-to-back hurricanes of Helene and Milton, and through it all, I am overwhelmed by the resiliency of our community, our neighbors, and our restaurant and store owners who have picked up the pieces and are forging ahead.
I have found that through these storms, there are many life lessons to be learned. Unfortunately, there will always be those who plan for Armageddon and clear out store shelves of the basic necessities or take enough gas to get them to the moon and back, never considering the needs of others. For most of us, they are a sobering reminder of what is important in life. We have built stronger bonds with friends, neighbors, and loved ones in their time of need. We’ve given our time and treasures to help our communities recover and supported the local businesses that have served us so well throughout the years. There was never a thought of repayment for our efforts, we were in this together.
We all get wrapped up in our day-to-day lives where we count on tomorrow to get together with friends or make the call that is long overdue. I’m as guilty as it seems, like years pass like months and weeks pass like days, only to have these storms put life in a different perspective. My most vivid reminder of the importance of our relationships was during Hurricane Charlie. Since we were all without power, we came out of our homes seeking relief from the heat and humidity inside and found ourselves catching up with friends and neighbors for the first time in months. Unfortunately, once power was restored, we returned to our homes and resumed our way of life, where we offered a simple wave as we passed.
Some may feel it is time to turn the page and start a new chapter in their lives where these storms no longer take a physical and emotional toll on them, while others feel the quality of life Florida affords more than offsets the infrequent storms that impact our areas. To me, the lessons are learned from the pause we are forced to take during our efforts to recover.
We often think of Thanksgiving and the holidays that follow as the time of year to give thanks for the blessings we’ve received. It is also the start of a season that beckons us to be more compassionate and giving to our loved ones. While the holidays are full of promise and merriment, the storms we endure create lasting bonds, almost like those that have served together in war. We set aside our differences and give of ourselves in service to others. Isn’t that what a life well lived is supposed to be about? Unfortunately, sometimes it takes a storm to get us back on track and bring out the best in us.
While the aftermath of these storms has left many of our streets looking like Spooky Walks littered with debris and ghost-like ships that occupy some of our area parks, the appearance of Halloween costumes and soon-to-be Christmas decorations are our reminder of the enjoyment we receive from these simple pleasures life affords us. However, our recovery together, especially this year, has created a more robust community bond far more valuable than anything we could have imagined.
-Gary Cardillo
We often measure one’s success in life by the wealth they’ve accumulated or the position they held on the corporate ladder. We’ve come to idolize sports and entertainment figures, or those we feel can benefit us as we try to attain success. But is that really the meaning of a “life well lived?” To some, it may be.
Several years ago, Toni approached me to help her find a home for her mother, Lin, a widow living in California. While she loved her life in California, Toni felt that her mom was getting older, and it made more sense to have her move closer to her. She quickly became part of a group of friends we met at St. Andrew’s South Golf Club, a course in the heart of the waterfront community of Punta Gorda Isles. Unlike most women her age, Lin, or as many of her close friends who affectionately called her “Mumsie,” became part of the gang and attended most of the club’s social events.
Linda Warwick was born in 1934 and grew up in the east end of London, living with her grandparents, parents, and three uncles in a small home. The east end of London was where the docks were located, and the River Thames ran behind their house. As a young child, factories were turning into munitions plants before her eyes, and a few short years later, the U.K. entered the war. It would be hard for anyone at five or six years of age living in the United States to appreciate the ravages of war. Still, with London being one of the largest cities in the world at that time and home to the British Empire, it became a vital target of the German Wehrmact, (armed forces). On September 7, 1940, later known as “Black Sunday,” the Germans unleashed their fury in a blitzkrieg (lightning war) with 300 bombers targeting London in the first of 57 consecutive nights that continued for the next eight months. Forced to find shelter any way they could, homes in their community were being destroyed, and with the continuous sound of gunfire and sirens echoing in their ears, it was a sobering reminder that their home could be next. Like so many others, they became “evacuees” and retreated to the safety of the countryside, having to, at times, share a home with other displaced families. While it appeared to offer a safer environment, they could see the glowing fires from the bombing raids in the various towns and cities from afar.
Despite the heartache of war, Linda recalls those special moments during the war when friends, relatives, and teachers would give of themselves to make sure the children were spared as much of the horrors of the war as possible. Later on in life, Linda would reflect on how resilient, tenacious, and determined they were not only to survive but to restore their country to its glory once again.
Years ago, I had a middle school teacher tell our class how fortunate we would be if we could count on one hand the number of close friends we had. As Lin was approaching her 90th birthday on July 25th, Toni and her husband Greg were planning a surprise birthday party for her at a local restaurant, to which almost 100 of her closest friends were invited. Unfortunately, five days prior to her celebrated day, she passed away.
Almost two years ago, my wife signed us up as members of St. Andrew’s South Golf Club, as it occurred to her I was spending too much time sitting behind a computer or working late into the evening, and my only outlet was doing yard work. Somewhere along the way, I became my father! I wasn’t doing anything fun in my spare time. Try explaining that to someone who spends half their year bundled up during the winter months, and they’ll think you lost your mind when you live on the water and close to a host of golf courses. Sure, there are more challenging courses than St. Andrews; for years, when asked why I didn’t join, I would tease and tell them that due to the relatively flat terrain of the course, that’s where they used to host the areas Greyhound races. Now before you think, “This guy must be some golfer,” let me tell you this course has gotten the better of me in more ways than one. While St. Andrew’s South may not be hosting the U.S. Open anytime soon, this club is second to none in terms of the people we’ve met and the friends we’ve made.
Golfers have their unique brand of humor. They can hit a great shot and tell you it’s just another of the many great shots they routinely make. And no one is quicker to tease you about the shot you just hit into the water or lost in the trees than the guys in your foursome. This may sound cruel to some, but that makes the sport so much fun, and the guys I play with will never miss an opportunity to celebrate your crummy shot. While there is no shortage of sarcasm, they are equally supportive of the good ones too….or at least they feign they are!
While the rest of the neighborhood was sound asleep, I was entertained by some shows and comedians we grew up watching. Between all the documentaries and infomercials, it was as if they were all waiting for me. There was Groucho Marx, All in the Family’s Archie Bunker, Sanford and Son’s Redd Foxx, Don Rickles, Robin Williams, Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Rodney Daingerfield, and George Carlin, to name a few. Shows and comedians I hadn’t seen in what seemed like decades not only took my mind off the discomfort I was experiencing but somehow made me realize the stark difference in the things that entertained us back then and how many of those things couldn’t be said today. How did we become so thinned-skinned that we couldn’t laugh at ourselves or gain a better understanding of life’s injustices without going into the frenzy we see today? Can we blame it all on the media?
We had friends who were politicians and others whose political opinions differed from ours. Maybe it was a time when we didn’t feel like doomsday was right around the corner and the president our friend supported was in the process of driving the train over a cliff. To this day, we still can discuss our differing viewpoints without the thought of a friendship being compromised. I always felt it was better to listen and learn from other people’s experiences, which made the shows I mentioned earlier so special. While most watched them for entertainment or just a laugh at the end of a long work day, I developed an even deeper appreciation of them during these overnight hours.
Don Rickles was an equal opportunity insulter. He made fun of every nationality and race you could imagine. If the celebrity guest or audience member wasn’t quick enough to catch on to his insult, he called them a “moron.” He always followed up with, “You know I’m kidding,” and then would roll his eyes to confirm that person was a moron. Try saying that to someone you don’t know today and see the response you get.
I saved George Carlin for last, as he was perhaps the best regarding social commentaries. In an article written by Helbert Enrique Asprilla, entitled “Why George Carlin Is My Dead Mentor,” he reflects on the life of the late George Carlin, who was known for his “thought-provoking, stand-up comedy, tackling topics such as politics, languages, and the human condition.” Asprilla continues by saying, “Carlin offers a wealth of knowledge and insight, challenging social norms and encouraging us to think critically about the world around us. Whether through his commentary on politics and government, his observations on the human experience, or his critiques on authority and institutions, Carlin’s comedy has much to teach us about the absurdity of the world and the importance of questioning the status quo.” In one of his routines, “Life is Worth Losing,” Carlin relates, “We’re all just temporary custodians of our bodies…we’re just passing through, and this is just a stop along the way.” Asprilla concluded, “Carlin’s perspective on the fleeting nature of life can help us appreciate and make the most of the time we have, rather than getting caught up on the trivialities and materialism of the world today.”
I consider myself very fortunate to have met so many wonderful people during my life that I’m blessed to call “friends.” Their backgrounds are as diverse as the world in which we live. Some have been politicians, others doctors, lawyers, law enforcement, and even those with rags-to-riches stories. While I love to celebrate their histories of accomplishment, the ones whose lives touch me most are those who passionately serve others, whether through personal sacrifice or by giving generously of their gifts and talents. Their backgrounds may differ vastly, but they desire to serve with little attention drawn to themselves. One such person is long-time friend Kim Amontree, whose contributions to our community read like a “Who’s Who.” Kim has served on the local school board as Vice Chair and as an integral member of a variety of boards and committees that include the “Punta Gorda Diversity Task Force,” “Charlotte County Chamber Government Affairs,” and “Charlotte County Reads” in addition to her various roles with the Florida School Boards Association. This association aims to increase student achievement by developing effective school board leadership and advocacy for public education.
Simply put, the FSBA is the “voice of education in Florida,” which Kim has served on multiple committees and continues today as co-Chair of the Legislative sub-Committee. Kim’s involvement with the community is just as comprehensive as she serves on the Board of Directors for the YMCA of Southwest Florida and is “Chair of the Punta Gorda YMCA Community Board.” Her passion for children does not end there as she is a “Coalition Member of Drug-Free Punta Gorda,” a “Volunteer Reading Buddy.” She has also served as a mentor for Take Stock in Children and a coach for Girls on the Run. I’ve often felt Kim was the person I would call if my house were on fire as she’d be the first one on the scene and have it under control before the fire trucks arrived. She’s not one to sit back and hope for change; she’s a team player who will invoke the change.
I often ask those looking to move to our area what brought them here. For Kim, it was an opportunity for her husband Jim, a highly respected Gastroenterologist, to join the Intermedic practice years ago. Kim recalled how they met through a group of friends while both were living in Albuquerque, New Mexico. They weren’t dating for long when Kim had an opportunity to move to New Orleans, working with NCR, a world-leading enterprise technology provider of software, hardware, and services for large banks and other entities. Jim was an Assistant Professor at the University of New Mexico when a close physician friend notified him of the Intermedic opportunity. Kim jokingly said, “I told Jim I wasn’t moving just for love. It would be for a ring, a house, and a dog.” So in 1991, they made the move and never looked back. Despite being on a fast track herself, Kim put her career on hold to help Jim open his practice which came to fruition in 1999. Years later, having helped create a thriving medical practice and raising three gifted children, Kim said, “Life is short, and I wanted to spend time doing things that matter.” Those who know Kim know of her passion for community and children specifically. Having been a Realtor myself for 20 years, the questions from those looking to move to our area center around medical services and education, the question most dear to Kim’s heart.
Few of us would disagree that we live in a world fraught with many issues, from health and finance to the environment. Kim reflected, “Unfortunately, the problems in society we face today the next generation is going to have to solve, and that comes through education.” Equally challenging is the environment our educators face today. Aside from the lack of decorum exhibited in debates of opposing thoughts and philosophies, you hear in classrooms and on college campuses throughout the country, not to mention security challenges, Kim said, “There is a direct tie to the impact on educational performance that stems from socio-economic conditions. Approximately 60% of the children are “direct certified” (receiving some form of government assistance). Over 90% are considered “economically needy.” While the pandemic had devastating effects on the 2020-2021 school year, where 30% of the children missed more than ten days of school, a dramatic increase from the 12% norm, Kim said, “The Charlotte County school system wasn’t going to take the foot off the gas; the students were expected to learn the curriculum.” In 2021, the Charlotte County School System had its highest graduation rate of 91%. Not only did more children graduate, but they scored in the top tier of Florida’s Advance Placement Standardized Test.
Kim’s decision to join an organization or board comes down to one significant fact, “Does it benefit the children of the community?” I’ve always felt we educate our children to benefit other cities and towns across the country since, historically, there have been limited employment opportunities locally. Kim said they could benefit from higher-paying jobs by providing workforce opportunities to serve the community’s growth, such as aviation, where students can graduate with FAA certifications. Kim continued by saying that with the cost of education reaching all-time highs, providing white-collar opportunities without going through a four-year college program would reduce student loan debt and enable these students to earn a good living in less time. She added, “If you want better medicine and services, you must support and have confidence in the school system.” By passing the “Yes For Success” referendum, teachers’ salaries increased from $38,000 to $54,000, which is one of the highest in the state. The referendum enabled the school system to address the psychological impact many children face today. Succinctly stated, “Schools are the front line of mental health issues.” As a result of the passage of the referendum, they were able to triple the number of social workers and double the number of psychologists.
Kim continued, “Discipline is one of the biggest barriers to educational success. It only takes a two percent discipline problem in a class to impact the other ninety-eight percent.” When you factor in some families’ socio-economic challenges, taking 20 minutes a day to read with a child is often compromised. Kim added, “Some parents don’t know what they don’t know.” Reading with your child stimulates from a knowledge base perspective and builds a stronger parental bond.” I have often thought with the absence of this bond; one can only assume there is a correlation as to why we see so many issues manifesting in today’s generations.
While most people would like to talk about themselves, Gary and Gail have always put their clients first, and their diverse backgrounds have provided their clients an unparalleled level of service and knowledge throughout the past years.