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Luck, Not only for the Irish

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Do you ever find yourself looking forward to that “holiday” of the month with the same anticipation you did as a kid? For me, I think of those special days almost as the dessert after a wonderful home-cooked meal. When I think of those days I find they mean the same to me today as they did when I was a child, and perhaps are the only traditions that haven’t changed throughout the years. I think of the fun we had on Halloween trick or treating in our costumes, Thanksgiving where we played touch football games before gorging ourselves on turkey and all the side dishes until we couldn’t move, and what more needs to be said about the excitement of the holiday season and New Year! While each month brings us a unique joy in its own way, the ones I find that make us all seem to laugh and take life a little less seriously are St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo. It doesn’t matter the color of your skin, your religion, ethnic background, or political beliefs, on those days we proudly celebrate with revelry as if that was part of our ancestry.

Recently we had dinner with a couple who introduced Gail and me on a blind date 35 years ago. They are from New York where the husband has had a jewelry business in the heart of New York’s Diamond District for many years. We were dining outside in St. Armand’s Circle in Sarasota and this couple was looking around like two kids entering Disney World, amazed at the number of people out and about enjoying the shops, restaurants, and beautiful evening weather. They had been to Florida many times before but this time was extra special as New York has been shut down to a large degree, and according to the husband, New York City has become a ghost town of sorts with rising crime rates and the closure of many businesses. However, despite the depressing news from New York, our conversations are always full of laughter as the husband has an uncanny sense of humor and like most wives, she just rolls her eyes.

While many have grown depressed being quarantined in their homes for months up north, the husband has maintained his sense of humor. He said, “You try to get creative, and when weather permits, you try to make the most of your time outdoors.” Being an avid tennis player who also enjoys the game of golf I asked, what other things he had tried. He replied, “Skeet shooting.” Detecting the puzzled look on my face he said, “I thought I’d give it a try….As a Jew we don’t hunt, we order in, but I figured it was something new and different. Unfortunately, birds were dropping from the trees and a plane fell out of the sky, but while I seemed to hit everything else, I couldn’t hit those clay pigeons.” I was so glad he hadn’t lost his sense of humor!
He continued by saying, “You guys don’t realize how lucky you are to live in Florida,” and for a couple who at first was very critical of our Governor opening up the state for business and schools the way he did, he said it is no wonder our Governor is the top real estate agent in New York as he is single-handedly spearheading the mass exodus out of the state.”
I found it amazing to see the change in perspective as years ago Florida was only seen as a place to retire, and now couples like our friends are giving serious consideration to possibly making the move themselves in the not too distant future, which we couldn’t be happier if they did. What I also found interesting is most of the husband’s Florida clients are in the Palm Beach area, which years ago seemed like the place they would eventually relocate, however, they shared with us how they wanted to get away from the stress, congestion, and the “personalities” they deal with daily and are finding southwest Florida provides everything they could want. I have to agree as I still find myself wondering in amazement that we live in a place people come to vacation.
As we were leaving the husband said, “Don’t forget St. Patrick’s Day is coming up.” I replied, “What side of your Jewish heritage emigrated from Ireland?” He replied, “I think it was the dog, but the only thing you need to remember is no one makes a better corned beef sandwich than a kosher deli.” As we walked away at the end of another perfect day, I had to admit he wasn’t wrong.
-Gary Cardillo

A Different Kind of New Years Resolution

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Each December we reflect on our journey from the past year with all its twists and turns and with great optimism look forward to the opportunities and promise that lie ahead in the coming New Year. Typically we start by making some kind of promise or resolution to ourselves in the form of increased exercise or by embarking on something more “self-focused” to make us a new and better version of ourselves. However, I’m sure like you, it doesn’t take long before life gets in the way and our best intentions are often put on the back burner only to be reset each month until we run out of months and it becomes next year’s resolution once again. The exercise I wanted to do, the book I wanted to read, the one I wanted to write, the trip I wanted to take, or just the simple pleasure of playing more golf or tennis seems to always fall under the category of “Things to do tomorrow,” only tomorrow has already been filled with ”Things that can’t wait another day!”
This year has been different. In looking back over the past year, in particular, it has been one where I feel we’ve all had a blaring horn in our face the entire time. If it isn’t the political parties blaming each other for the divisiveness going on in the country, it is the round the clock media coverage each claiming the other is biased, while giving you their jaded view. Try having a conversation with someone before it turns into political dialogue and even if you agree it is typically emotionally filled. Add the Coronavirus to the mix, and the impact it has had on all of us, and you find yourself saying, “I’m so glad 2020 is over.”
While to some that may seem like a welcome relief, I thought, “How sad?” We just took one valuable year out of our lives and said, “Let’s throw it away.” I’ve gone through many trying periods in my life, but I never wanted to throw away an entire year, as despite the challenges and difficulties there were lessons learned that have benefitted me throughout my life.
People ask me all the time what my thoughts have been this past year and why I seem so calm as a result. My faith in God has been the main reason for me to remain somewhat at peace amid the media chaos however, I have always tended to look at things from a common-sense perspective. I don’t feel the need to be heard, or for my opinion to outweigh those of others. I find as I’ve gotten older there is more wisdom in listening than projecting an opinion and somewhere along the way common sense becomes even more clear despite what the media critics have to say.
Since Covid began I’ve seen it bring out the best and worst in some people. Some are doing their best to support those struggling through these challenging times by supporting their businesses, bringing food to those in need, or just staying in touch, letting them know there is someone who cares. Others haven’t been quite so gracious, never embodying the desire to share or step aside to help others. Some have become depressed from the lack of social interaction while others maintained their sense of humor. In a post I read the other day, a man by the name of Bernie posted, “I told my wife post Covid I will take her anywhere in the world. I’m holding up a map of the world in the kitchen and told her to throw a dart and wherever it lands, we would go…..Apparently we are going to spend two weeks behind the refrigerator!” For me, it has been a time to reflect on what is important in life and realize how fortunate we are.
Since this pandemic began we’ve seen a tremendous influx of people moving to Florida, finally realizing what we have been blessed with for so long, “water, warmth, and way of life,” a phrase I credit to a friend, public speaker, and respected Realtor Denny Grimes. Since January of last year, we were hearing stories of those looking to escape the inclement weather and high taxes in the north. However, when the pandemic hit it facilitated a mass movement of those looking to escape the densely populated areas and where commuting via mass transit was a way of life. With the realization, it was now possible to work remotely and transition from the rat race to a better quality of life, these “new Floridians” were about to discover what we have oftentimes taken for granted. As a Realtor, we are typically one of the first points of contact for those looking to relocate to our beautiful state. To see the look of almost disbelief on their faces that they have arrived at what many call “paradise,” and no longer have to make the dreaded journey back north in a few short weeks, has been one of my most gratifying experiences and one I find so hard to put into words. Before long they usually share with me how friendly everyone is, how people are always outside enjoying each other’s company, and how clean our highways and stores are kept, things we oftentimes take for granted. Isn’t it funny how those of us who lived in the north often say when returning from a trip back home say, “How did we ever want to live in that environment?
As I look at the changes I want to make in myself this year I’m often amazed at the wisdom and futuristic foresight that writers of the 1940’s and 1950’s such as Ayn Rand, (Atlas Shrugged), George Orwell (“Nineteen Eighty-Four), and Ray Bradbury (Fahrenheit 451) documented in their writings. Many of the scenarios they envisioned we are living in today. For those who have read these books and other similar themed writings look at the tug of war and name-calling going on in our nation’s capital and the controlling influence of social media with little or no surprise. While others may feel they are on a runaway train they can do nothing about, my resolution is not to panic and assume the role of the victim, but to incorporate the lessons learned from these writings so I can take the emotion out of the “news of the day,” and interact with those I meet from a common-sense perspective and help preserve those special attributes that have made our community and those we share it with so special. Future generations are watching, as well as those moving to our communities. Hopefully the difference I make in myself will inspire others to do the same and instead of talking at each other we can speak with one another and enjoy this wonderful quality of life we’ve come to call home.

A Christmas to Remember

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As we celebrate the holidays and the start of the New Year, like most, I look back over this past year and feel I just got off a roller coaster ride. For some, it has been exhilarating, for others, the ride couldn’t have ended soon enough. I’m not sure I’ve seen a year like this where there were such polarizing views, and not just in politics. Many landmark businesses went out while others flourished. Depending which side of the political aisle you stand, it was either a year of great accomplishment or one of unprecedented strife, discourse and divide. Friendships suffered while some were forged. Many became depressed and prayed for this year to end while others enjoyed the unexpected gift they received in taking a step back to savor the quality of family time that was lost during the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

The pandemic provided somewhat of an awakening to those living in big cities and commuting via mass transit. It also created a paradigm shift for employers who only thought working under management’s watchful eye in a corporate setting resulted in the greatest level of productivity. Both soon found out there wasn’t a drop off in productivity and in some cases it increased which has fostered a reevaluation in business strategies and the attainment of a better quality of life.
There is the old adage, “Man makes plans and God laughs,” and just when we thought we had it figured out that we work thirty or forty years, retire and move to Florida, many found out there is now a way to do both.
In writing these newsletters my wife frequently asks, “Why do you refer to your childhood so often,” and my answer is, “because that was a time when life seemed more innocent and enjoyment of those simple pleasures left an indelible mark on me.” We weren’t preoccupied with the pressures of everyday life and the constant need to chase something to satisfy our innate desire for peace and pleasure. Of course Gail was quick to remind me as a teenager my biggest concerns would have been passing my high school and college tests or which team I was going to get picked to play on with my friends. I have to admit she was right, but I still think that was a very special time in life for most of us that we are trying to recapture.
In our business we constantly hear from those looking to make the move to Florida, “I’ve had the big home, the fancy cars and membership to the country club, but I want to simplify things and enjoy then next chapter of my life. Isn’t it ironic how life goes full circle? We marvel at the inquisitiveness of a child, but in our later years we find enjoyment in many of the same things we did as children. However, while this year has been one full of challenges of one kind or another I recall something very profound a dear friend of mine shared with me about how adults and children perceive many of the same scenarios differently. His name is Bob DeStefano and he was at one time the longest tenured golf professional in the country and was recognized by the PGA for his contribution to junior golf and for the junior golf program he created at Gardiner’s Bay Country Club located on Shelter Island, New York. Bob said, “You know the difference between children and adults? Adults will come into the pro shop and talk about all the bad shots during their round, but children will always talk about the one good one they had.” I’ve often thought about Bob’s analogy and wondered how some children have coped with the events from this past year and what their thoughts were for the New Year. I thought who better than to reach out to a couple of families we know who have had to adjust to the changes brought on by the pandemic with young children.
Hailey, Lily, Avra and Olivia are four young ladies aged 5 through 8 who are wise beyond their years. Hailey and Lily just moved to Florida while Avra and Oliva moved from Florida out of state. Both families have had to adjust work schedules to accommodate on line learning or home schooling as part of their daily routine. For most kids my age, if you got a day off from school you were thrilled, but to think ten months of not having to go to school would have been a dream come true! The difference for these girls was the social interaction and school environment that was sorely missed. Eight year old Olivia summed it up best when she said, “I like being at school but we don’t get to go to the gym or cafeteria with all the other kids, we pretty much see just the kids in my class.”. Five year old Hailey said she didn’t like learning at home and loves going to school. In fact all four girls missed the interaction with their classmates and the biggest negative during this time was wearing masks and not going out to eat very often.
When asked if they like to give gifts or receive them, while they all loved the surprise of receiving them, giving gifts and making them whenever possible brought all of them great joy. Avra shared a story of making a gift for a boy in her class who had autism. Olivia shared a story of their neighborhood sponsoring a family and how she was in the process of helping get warm clothes for a 10 year old boy.
While this was a year of change for all of us I was amazed at not only how well these girls were coping but the appreciation they had for what was going on in the world around them; which is quite a testimony to the parents they have. All four girls hoped everyone would be healthy and safe for the new year but were very aware of others not having the same good fortune. I was also surprised by the balance they wanted both inside and out of the home. Equally amazing to me was their responses were all inclusive of others, and not focused on the things they missed during this time. I honestly felt, this is a life lesson we could all learn.
Of course no interview with young children could end without asking if they had an opportunity to meet Santa. I had remarked a couple of times to Gail how sad I felt seeing Santa sitting by himself at a mall without the excitement of children all around. Olivia replied by saying she and Avra did get to meet Santa but unlike past years where they were able to sit on his lap, this year they were sitting behind plexiglass, but she added, “We still did get to tell him what we wanted.” Hailey, whose personality is bigger than her, said she and Lily haven’t had an opportunity to meet Santa yet, but I’m sure when she gets finished with him, he’ll be ready for a long winter’s nap!
The lessons I learned from these girls was that they seemed to take their challenges more in stride but had a greater compassion for others who weren’t coping quite as well. While they enjoyed getting out and seeing their classmates they were apart from for so long, they savored their life at home, and the loving environment their parents created. It was their hope for the New Year that others could enjoy the same where everyone could be happy and healthy. And that is our wish for you.
May the holidays and New Year bring you much joy and happiness.
-Gary and Gail Cardillo

Thanksgiving from a Different Perspective

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With summer long gone and the last vestiges of fall colors still on the trees, my friends and I embarked on our daily walk through the woods. No longer did we have to avoid the hot summer sun and stay in the protective shadows cast by the pine trees and giant oaks, we could now explore paths we hadn’t taken in months, and the sights were amazing. The colors that fell across the tranquil ponds were like a painting too beautiful to describe. Deer grazed by water’s edge, squirrels were gathering up acorns and rabbits scampered through the leaves without a care in the world. With each one of our furry friends there to greet us each day, it was a sight we came accustomed to and one we called home.
Feeling adventurous we decided to take a different path this day and before we knew it our surroundings had changed dramatically. No longer were we in the warm embrace of the forest, we were in a concrete jungle. There were horns honking, people yelling at each other and yard signs all over the place. As I stepped off the curb one of my friends pulled me out of the path of a speeding car where the driver yelled at me to watch where I was going. Visibly shaken my friends and I felt it was much safer to stay on the sidewalk where we came upon a small group of stores. There were carts full of fresh cut flowers, fruits and vegetables on display which gave us a sense of being home, until one of my friends decided to sample some of the fruits causing the store owner to chase us down the block with broom in hand.
At first we thought the ruckus we created caused people to stop and stare at us. We started to gloat, feeling somewhat like celebrities as we strutted down the sidewalk. However, our fame was short lived when we came upon a butcher shop and to our horror was a picture in the window none of us will soon forget.

“Do you see what I see?” asked one of my friends.
“See what you see,” I replied, “Did you read the caption below?”
My friend froze in his tracks as he read, “Come in for your fresh killed turkeys.”
“Do you think that happened to Tom last year and he wound up on someone’s dinner table?”
“That would explain why we haven’t seen him,” I replied, “I thought he just moved.”
As we contemplated our fate a tall shadow appeared over us in the form of a mustachioed butcher with cleaver in hand.
“Run for it” I yelled, as we sprinted back to our home in the woods.
“I used to look forward to this time of year,” another of my friends said, as he tried to catch his breath, “but why do they call it Thanksgiving?”
I replied, “For our sake I hope it is because it is only one day out of the year!”
With this being a year we won’t soon forget, we hope this Thanksgiving will be a time to reflect on the things we can be thankful for and appreciate the friendships and family we have along with the blessings we oftentimes take for granted.
We send our wishes to you and your family for a very Happy Thanksgiving.

-Your Friend the Turkey, Gary and Gail

Halloween and the Monsters Among Us

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I couldn’t help but look back to this time of year as a kid growing up when we carved pumpkins and watched horror movies on Chiller Theater that left us so scared that every creak and sound we heard in our home had us diving under the covers somehow thinking we wouldn’t be seen by these creatures of the night. What Halloween would be complete without Frankenstein, The Wolfman, Dracula and a supporting cast of Ghouls, Mummies, Werewolfs, Ghosts, Witches and Vampires! After working ourselves into a terrified frenzy the thought of putting out the garbage that night was the last thing you wanted to hear your mom ask you to do. “Mom can’t it wait until morning, I really don’t want to be burned at the stake?”
We dressed up as our favorite creatures, sports heroes and celebrities. Guys dressed as girls, girls dressed as guys and we even dressed up like old geezers, which at that time anyone over 30 years of age qualified.
We freely roamed our neighborhood streets filling our shopping bags so full of candy it would take decades to consume, while keeping most dentists gainfully employed. And of course the ammunition of the day was a carton of eggs, cans of shaving cream, sticks of chalk and a sock full of flour. You never had to ask which home didn’t hand out candy, as the dreaded chalk mark on the sidewalk indicated no one was home and as a consequence for being so unthoughtful typically resulted in the owner being seen washing off the salvo of eggs from the night before.
It was fun trick or treating in disguise when no one knew who you were and the stories told the following day from that special Halloween night were priceless. It also gave us the opportunity to express ourselves in ways that were fun, carefree and creative. However, despite our unique way of expressing ourselves we seemed to bond a little bit closer.
This year has been a year of adjustment. For many it has been a year of despair and others a time of reflection. However, one thing I think we can all agree on is that it is a time when we are focusing on our differences rather than what has brought us together. Just like those horror movies we watched as kids that depicted creatures we knew not from where they came, today we are seeing different kinds of monsters who are tormenting us 24 hours a day.

Back then we could put our monsters back in the closet until the following year, the kind we are facing today think they are here to stay. They are dressed differently and walk amongst us both day and night. When we got scared we pulled the covers over our heads, today I hear kids say they don’t want to hear what is going on in our country or around the world as it sounds too scary.
I’m not sure how we got so off track, but when I think of so many wonderful things we have to enjoy that are found in community events, family and friends it seems like those are the things we need to take back out of the closet labeled “Taking for Granted,” and realize our fondest childhood recollections are within easy reach with lots of great memories still to be made.

While this year’s Halloween may be a little different, it can still be one that will be fun to enjoy and give us that emotional break we all could use. Just make sure you keep an eye out for those creatures in the night when you hear those terrifying words, “Honey, can you take out the garbage! 

 -Gary Cardillo

About The Gary Cardillo Group

Gary Cardillo, Realtor While most people would like to talk about themselves, Gary and Gail have always put their clients first, and their diverse backgrounds have provided their clients an unparalleled level of service and knowledge throughout the past years.
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